All Women's Talk

How to Keep Your Cool when Things Are Not Going as Planned ...

By Alison

"The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry," the saying goes - and the plans of women do as well! And it's so easy to get annoyed or panic when things don't go as they should. So how do you keep your cool when things seem to be falling apart? Try these tips to help you stay in control of the situation …

1 Don't Panic! It Might Not Be as Bad as You Think

The first step is to not panic; the situation might not be as bad as you think. Take a step back and look at it objectively. Your initial assumption that it's all going wrong may not be right. Once you've thought about it, you might realise there's no need to worry. Or you may be able to turn things around.

2 Be Adaptable - Go with the Flow

Since things can so easy deviate from how you expect them to turn out, it pays to be adaptable. Go with the flow; if you don't get offered a place on the course you really want, you may find an opportunity that works for you just as well. You can't always get what you want, and plans don't always succeed, so adjust your expectations and consider new plans.

3 Is It Salvageable?

You may also find that the situation is salvageable, so take control. Find out what you need to do to get back on track. Many things don't work out the first time, but go smoothly if you try again. For example, if you fail a test you can usually retake it. Few things only offer one attempt for you to get it right.

4 Ask for Help

Don't be afraid to ask for help. There's no shame in things going wrong - it happens to the best of us. The important thing is to admit that you can't handle the situation alone and that you need help and advice. Talk to the people who can help, or offer useful advice; they may be able to see solutions that you can't.

5 Don't Blame Anyone

We tend to lash out and blame someone else when things go wrong - or just get angry because it seems to be falling apart. But it's not always someone's fault, and even if it is, losing your temper won't help. You're much more likely to be able to turn things around if you keep your cool and think about what to do.

6 Admit What's Happening - Don't Be in Denial

Some people, however, refuse to admit that things aren't going according to plan, and are completely in denial. But the first step to regaining control of the situation is to accept that it's not gone the way you expected. So face facts and admit what's happening, so that you can set about taking action.

7 Shrug It off

Sometimes when things don't go as you'd wanted you just have to shrug it off and accept it as one of those things. Your life doesn't always go according to plan, and it's as well to accept that. We can't control everything!

So be adaptable, and you'll cope with whatever life brings. Plans don't always work out, and sometimes that's for the best. Have you ever had your plans go horribly wrong, and how did you react?

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