People are going to piss you off, it's just a fact of life. One of the hardest things is managing anger when people offend you! After all, there's nothing that can be done to actively remedy many irritating situations, so being angry is all there is! And it's usually people who are close to you who do and say things that cause your anger to rise! Fortunately, there are strategic techniques for managing your anger that won't escalate the situation and in fact, will cool you down and help you think rationally!
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1. Walk Away 💃🏻
When I'm in a moment of extreme anger and irritation, I immediately feel like screaming and breaking things. And, thinking more about what happened only makes me more angry! Before you reach the point where you might do something you regret, walk away from the situation. If it's person who's offended you, give yourself distance from them to cool down.
2. Breath Deeply 🌬
Deep breathing is always a good idea! Used as a meditative technique, taking deep breaths calms your central nervous system, slows your heart rate, and reduces anxiety and stress. In a moment of chaos, instead of giving in to your natural desires of anger (and possibly, regret!), take a few deep breaths!
Frequently asked questions
Honestly, it's normal to feel angry and want to react physically, but it's important to understand that feeling this way often means you're just overwhelmed and need a moment to breathe and figure things out.
Take a deep breath, count to ten, and try to remove yourself from the situation if possible. Remember, reacting physically can escalate things and make you feel worse in the long run.
Sometimes, old frustrations or pent-up stress trigger these feelings unexpectedly. It's a sign that you might need to address underlying issues or take some time for self-care.
In general, it's best to avoid physical reactions. There might be extreme situations where you need to defend yourself, but otherwise, try to communicate your feelings or step away.
Reflect on what triggered you and think about healthier ways to handle similar situations. Maybe talk to someone you trust or write down your thoughts to process them better.
3. Distract Yourself 🍻📲📺
Never underestimate the art of distraction. After walking away from the initial event, find something to take your mind off of things and to regain composure. Get a beer with a friend, watch some TV, browse social media- anything that allows for a moratorium of relief from the present! You'll be surprised how much calmer you feel after. 👌🏽
4. Get Some Exercise 🏋🏽
In all honesty, working out is the perfect way to blow off some steam! You can focus all of your anger and emotions into your exercise routine, which will not only allow for a killer workout but will naturally boost endorphins! Those feel-good emotions are so needed after someone has truly pissed you off!
5. Retail Therapy! 👠🎒
I can't think of many (not serious) life crisis that can't be fixed, or at least temporarily remedied by a little retail therapy! Go out and buy those shoes you've been eyeing for a while! You'll get a rush of excitement and it might just be enough to keep your anger at bay before you're able to talk it out.
6. Find Common Ground 👯
In most arguments, there's always a common ground of agreement that can be reached. No one is ever 100 percent right, and sometimes all it takes is putting yourself in their shoes to see things from their perspective. Even if they are *mostly* in the wrong for offending you, if you give a little and show some understanding, it's waaaay easier for them to see their fault and promptly apologize!
7. Talk It out 🗣
Once you've cooled off and have thought about what you'd like to say, then you need to talk it out with the offender! Remember to listen, not use accusatory words, and explain how their actions made you feel. It's all in your tone of voice and how you approach the situation that will make all the difference!
Just keep in mind that anger that lasts has no benefits whatsoever. In fact, it can cause emotional and even physiological problems for YOU. Next time you feel angry when someone has wronged you, use these techniques listed to help cope and cool down! 💁🏻
Comments
Shanaz: Or just slap them and skip all this steps. 😝
SammyS: Hmmm. Needed this right now. I have a really hard time dealing with my emotions. I also have personality disorders, PTSD, anxiety, etc and so on. I worry that one day my emotions will get the better of me and I'll hurt someone
SammyS: Just looking back on this and yes I was having intervention with a social worker/counsellor. However I'm not really a big talker and have a great support network (family). Agree with you and I do, at times have negative self talk/chatter in my head.
SammyS: People are so cruel 😢
SammyS: But I'm getting better at controlling my thoughts and talking down the negative to enable some positive!
SammyS: In saying that...people often provoke me or quite often a 3rd party involves themselves in my relationship in an attempt to break me and my partner up
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