The Telltale Signs You're Selling Yourself Short in Life ...

1. You

The people who you surround yourself with are a reflection back upon you. Look at them in a way as a mirror of the way you see yourself. Do you feel as if you are with people who respect you, who love you, who are pushing toward positive goals? OR do you feel as if the people in your circle drain you, make you question yourself and your motives, and make jokes at your expense? If your friends aren’t benefitting you, remove yourself from that energy.

2. Control

We have agency over our own lives. We can make our own decisions. We can decide whether to wear this shirt, or that pair of pants, or to eat at this restaurant, or to follow this dream. If you feel almost constantly shaken in your convictions, it’s because you’re confident in who you are. You are powerful and can make good decision. Don’t allow someone to tell you they know what is best for you just because you feel shy or unsure. Advice is always helpful, but you know what’s best for you.

3. Confidence

We wish it were something you could buy at the store, stir into a cup of coffee in the morning. But the reality of life is that your self-esteem is always fluctuating, rising and waning like the mercury in a thermometer. Low self-esteem is the mark of someone who is underestimating themselves, who is selling themselves short, who doesn’t believe in their own worth. Everyone is good at one thing, at minimum. And it takes time to get better at other things. You just need to allow yourself time.

4. Want

Do your desires and wants always seem just out of reach? Do you think that guy is just.. too hot for you? That girl is way too smart, way too eloquent to want to be friends with you. Or are you allowing your insecurities to do the driving? Tie them up and toss them in the trunk of your life’s car, then get BACK in the driver’s seat. Having desires and dreams and goals that seem out of reach is fine, because it gives you something to aspire to. Don’t set your sights low just because you don’t think you deserve something.

5. Others

Do you find yourself looking at other people in an attempt to gauge who you are? Lifestyle blog Power of Positivity explains that comparison and competition is a negative habit, one that someone with low self-esteem will rest on. The blog explains, “We can easily log onto Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or other social media sites to get a glimpse into people’s lives 24/7. However, social media doesn’t usually portray an accurate picture of someone’s life.”

6. Me

So when you look outside of yourself, see inspiration as opposed to what you are not. Sure, that billionaire on Instagram is in Dubai riding a jetski on a Saturday. And sure that bikini model has abs you could probably crack a walnut on. But that shouldn’t make you jealous or create envious thoughts. Inspire yourself to push forward. Power of Positivity is right to say there is more to a photo than what you can see.

7. Reddit

This conversation really stems around confidence. If you believe big things will happen for you, then that is what you will see manifested in your future. But if you think you will amount to nothing, then that will surely happen. It’s all about your state of mind. It’s all about confidence. We headed over to Reddit to see how people kept their spirits high in the midst of life’s low moments.

8. User Johnvandyke2

“Confidence isn't really anything other than how well you can project your assuredness towards others. Con-artists use psychological tricks to convince people that they're something they're not because they are confident in their actions and dressed appropriately to deceive you. As (hopefully) a more legitimate source of reference, you need to dress the part and dressing the part and looking sharp along with maintaining your appearance (physical training included) all add to your ability to project confidence.”

9. Girls

If you’re afraid of the opposite sex, user scorpionjacket has something to say to you. We are all just people, no matter how you categorize us! “I know this sounds obvious,” he writes, “but I think a lot of guys believe this but don’t really understand it. Girls have all the same fears, hopes, dreams, anxieties, etc. that you do… And just like any other person, you can literally just talk to them normally.”

10. Act

User OrangeCassetteTapes relied on the old show business trick, fake it until you bloody well make it darling! They explain, “My confidence comes from either knowing what I'm doing, or remembering to act like I know what I'm doing. When you do either of those things, it seems like people how confident people are treated, then the affect kinda snowballs.”

11. Good

User LemmeHollaAtMyBabies explains, “Just find something about yourself that makes you feel good about yourself. I don't consider myself good looking but I've been told I was funny, so used that as a means to feel confident. Because of that, I carry myself in a certain way, no one cares that I'm not the best looking dude, it's all about the feel you're giving off, and that makes me confident about myself. Find that thing, everyone has something!!”

12. Relationships

User Eternal_Rabbit writes, “I never put much thought into until I met my wife. She had social anxiety, it's not bad but it sometimes keeps here from meeting people, or feeling confident. I am a social butterfly, if you're listen and engaging them we're talking. I think it's something you just have, or you aren't affected with anxiety. I agree with a comment that there is a difference between ignorance and confidence. If you're ignorant you aren't confident, you're just compensating for something. My advice is relax, breath, and be yourself.”

13. Key

User for_sweden explains, “Are you reading this? That means you learned how to read. That means you transformed your mind. You worked on it over a long time so you could read. So you have to make the choice, I will be better tomorrow than what I am today. If you never make this choice, you will always lack confidence. The second you start making this choice and repeat making this choice, you will gain confidence.”

Do you think you often sell yourself short? Or do you think you're fairly confident? We want to hear from you in the comments section. If you feel you're confident, what tips would you give to someone working to get there too. Let us know your thoughts and experiences!