All Women's Talk

7 Lessons We Learn about Ourselves in Defeat ...

By Breton

Nobody likes losing but in defeat there are many lessons we learn about ourselves. For some people the pain of losing will completely overwhelm the euphoric feeling that we experience when we emerge victorious. There is an extremely thin line that separates failure from success, but it's important whatever the outcome that you remain dignified and graceful in your actions. There is no limit to the lessons we learn about ourselves when we have failed to prevail. Here are seven examples of how can you turn the negative connotations associated with defeat into a cloud of positivity.

1 Learn from Your Mistakes

Nobody is flawless and consequently there are always lessons we learn about ourselves. Unfortunately we all make mistakes and therefore it is crucial that we do all we can to rectify them when we face our next challenge. Every loss and every defeat should prove to be a catalyst in improving our performance next time round. None of us can claim to be perfect can we?

2 Our Strength of Character

We have seen it so many times haven’t we? People throwing the towel in when things are not going their way. Defeat does not symbolize the end of a person, but quitting does. It is a great test of courage and resolve to continue performing at your maximum level, even though in your heart you know defeat is imminent. Promise me you will never give up.

3 Our Respect for Others

In competition there has to be a winner and a loser. However it's essential you respect the efforts and abilities of everybody, no matter where you finish. Nobody can claim to be a great champion if they do not conduct themselves in a way that will command the respect of others. On the other hand we have to accept the times when somebody has performed at a higher level than ourselves and therefore deserve the plaudits along with our admiration. As the old saying goes, “Every dog has its day.”

4 There's More to Life than Winning

The history books remember the winners and can provide us with special memories to cherish for years to come. However we should not obsess with becoming number one or the best in our field. It is not the be all and end all. Instead you should value the integrities of life that you could learn from a competitive situation and this is best demonstrated when we suffer defeat. The development of personal qualities which you can use in everyday existence should be your focus, rather than the one track mindset of ‘win at all costs.’

5 Defeat Makes Us Appreciate Victory More

A setback or narrowly missing out on victory enables us to appreciate winning more when we have our moments basking in glory. Defeat isn’t about comparing and competing with others. It is far more important to assess your achievements against your own goals and ambition. If you learn from defeat then deep down you haven’t really lost.

6 Avoid Excuses

I lose count how many times people make excuses when they are beaten fair and square. Whether it’s the weather, the referee, faulty equipment or simply ‘bad luck’, there always appears someone or something else to blame. Ultimately it is up to us to analyse ourselves when we just come up short of expectation. Defeat teaches us the valuable lesson of taking responsibility for our own performance and steering clear of passing the buck onto others.

7 Our Levels of Motivation

None of us have a divine right to emerge triumphant whenever we want. Therefore a few defeats should be seen as a blessing in disguise as it can help us raise our levels of motivation and assess our shortcomings. Every great champion has had to come back from defeat and so will you. See defeat as a challenge and you will rise to the summit once again.

Defeat at times can be a very painful process to go through, but we must all learn from it and then take action. How did you react when you last suffered defeat?

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