By Alicia • 34 Comments
There are a lot of great things about being a firstborn child and a few that’re challenging, too. I’m a firstborn so I can completely relate to you on this subject. There’s a lot of truth in the findings on birth order studies. It’s very interesting to learn about your birth order and how it impacts your personality and helps make you who you are.
As a firstborn, you’ve got ambition. The sky’s the limit as far as you’re concerned. You’ve got big dreams and big goals and that’s a great thing. You can make them all come true with hard work and determination. Be proud of your desire to grow and stretch yourself to be the best that you can be. Many people who’ve changed the world were firstborns.
Firstborns have an inner drive to be the best at whatever they’re doing. It’s reported that this is a strong part of their personality because they’ve always tried so hard to please their parents. Being the sole focus of their parents’ attention until another child comes along can plant the seed to be a perfectionist. Something a firstborn usually has to learn in their life is that wanting to do your best is fine but perfectionism isn’t a good thing. Learning to settle for less than perfect can be difficult for firstborns.
This heightened strive for excellence often leads to impressive achievements and high self-expectations. However, it can also become a stressor, as firstborns may fear failing or disappointing others. It's important for the eldest sibling to recognize that making mistakes is a natural part of growth and to be gentle with themselves when things don't go as planned. Acceptance and understanding that perfection is unattainable can lead to a healthier and more balanced outlook on life's accomplishments and challenges.
You can count on a firstborn to be responsible. More than likely, you’ve taken responsibility very seriously since you were a child. Knowing someone is counting on you for something is very motivating to you. You don’t want to let anyone down. Being responsible is a wonderful trait to have and can be very beneficial to you.
Firstborns like to be in charge which makes them great candidates for leadership positions. But it’s important to be careful with this desire for control. It can cause trouble in your relationships. It’s good to learn about boundaries and what you are and aren’t responsible for. Letting others live their own lives is not easy for a firstborn if you think you know what’s best for them.
You probably aren’t a big risk taker if you’re a firstborn. I know that I’m not. I like what’s safe and what I already know. But it’s okay to be cautious. It can save you a lot of grief in your life to be on the cautious side. Appreciate this characteristic about yourself.
Although you probably don’t want to admit it, you may be a people pleaser if you’re a firstborn. Let’s blame it on trying to please mom and dad for so long without any siblings to share that job. This can cause you a lot of stress in your life until you learn to overcome it. While it’s important to do your best in school, at work or in your personal life, remember that you can’t make everyone happy. Once you learn this, you’ll have much more peace in your life.
Trying to maintain that perfect child image can be emotionally draining. It often leads to setting unrealistically high standards for yourself and constantly seeking approval. The initial absence of a sibling to divert parents' attention might make you inherently attuned to their expectations. Learn to set healthy boundaries and understand that it's perfectly okay to say no. Balancing your wants with others' needs is key. Once you establish this, you'll not only reduce your stress levels but also build better, more genuine relationships. This self-awareness is a powerful step towards emotional maturity and a happier you.
As a firstborn, you probably put a lot of pressure on yourself which can equal a lot of stress. I feel for you, fellow firstborns! I know this feeling all too well. I also know that when you stop making things harder than they should be, you’ll be happier. It’s something that you can overcome.
These are 7 traits of a firstborn. Do you see any of them in yourself? You’re welcome to share your thoughts.