All Women's Talk

7 Lovely Ways to Get on the Independent Path ...

By Casey

What’s with guys always needing to be with their "bros" or girls always going to the bathroom with their whole posse? Stop depending and get on the independent path. A perfect example of an independent "individual," The Statue of Liberty — she stands alone, stands strong, stands independently. Life is too short to depend on others. Making decisions, as in what is worth giving up, in order to achieve something else, will optimize independence. Whether it be making the smallest choice, such as choosing between a Hershey bar or a fruit salad, or the biggest decision, such as moving to a new country or switching career paths, will get you on the that independent path.

1 Believe in Yourself

It’s so easy to doubt yourself and give up on yourself. When in reality, when it really comes down to it, you only have yourself to fall back on, so stop the pitying and start believing! Believe that you have what it takes to make that deadline or attain that goal. It’s important to believe in you and be secure with yourself. That empowering feeling will give you that boost to get on the independent path.

2 Start Relying on You

Stop depending on others, and start turning to yourself. People rely way, way too much on others. It’s unnecessary and unappealing. Take charge of your happiness. This will bring fulfillment. It will take the burden off of the person you are depending on and you will have unlimited possibilities. Making decisions on your own is key. Take advantage of that brain of yours and make decisions that are in your best interest. You have to satisfy yourself and make yourself happy before you can be there for others.

3 Having Alone Time

You don’t really need a friend or a companion to go to the movies or take a walk, do you? Start doing activities without another individual. There’s a therapeutic aura about being alone while being active. It can clear your mind, help you make a near future decision, or simply just give you a breath of fresh air. Stop with the stress of always having to have plans or have others surrounding you. Go to that movie alone, take a walk in the park by yourself, learn to love being in the company of yourself.

4 Instead of Stressing, Appreciate

Appreciate the relationships you have, the job you acquire, the classes you are taking. There is no reason to base your life on the should of, would of, could of. Relationships come and go as well as jobs, friends, and schooling so it’s not worth the stress. Change the warped perception of relationships and just enjoy. Some things come and go as fast as a lighting bolt so take advantage and appreciate the time spent.

5 Stop with the Fear

There’s nothing to be afraid of. Independence is an amazing quality. To be able to walk into a room alone, to be able to stand your ground, and to be able to rely just on you is an accomplishment. When I look at individuals who are older than myself who cannot make their own decisions or are afraid to, it’s unattractive. Make the most effective and efficient decisions. Hakuna Matata — it means no worries!

6 Live in the Now, Not the Future

Who knows what’s going to happen tomorrow, next month, or in the next 5 years? Live for today. Some say, "Take it day by day." My motto is, "Take it second by second." Stop living for what may or may not happen and just make things happen. Now I’m not saying to stop planning for that important meeting or important exam you have tomorrow, but in other words, when planning and preparing for that meeting or exam, stop thinking about the meeting after that and the meeting after that, etc. Stay in the present, take a deep breath, and just relax.

7 Look to Yourself for Advice

Take responsibility and control of the life you want. Afraid of failure? Well you can’t fail unless you test out the waters. Even though every one wants a second opinion just to clarify a decision, take advice from within and do what you want. Take that mistake or two and embrace and learn from it. We’re all going to make mistakes, but it’s the success that makes us stronger and more independent.

I know, I know, it’s way easier said than done to be fully independent. Of course going for dinner and spending time with family, friends, significant others, and co-workers are a great way of letting off steam, but independence is beyond just letting off steam. It’s about confidence, self-reliance, and appreciation of what you have to offer yourself. Give yourself the freedom you deserve. It’s time to give yourself the breath of fresh air you need. Tomorrow when you wake up, what changes and decisions are you going to make to put yourself on that independent path?

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