I believe everyone should know at least a few things on how to avoid being the subject of gossip, because this can be a very frustrating or upsetting position. Even if you never intended to do something that could affect others, you too, at a certain point in your life, could become the victim of gossip. This can really affect your relationships, your reputation and even your self-esteem. So, here are a few tips on how to avoid being the subject of gossip, tips I hope you will find very useful.
1. Keep Your Personal Affairs Private
The best thing you can do, if you want to learn how to avoid being the subject of gossip, is to try to always keep your personal affairs private. It’s okay to talk about your problems or worries with your family or with your closest friends, but you should pay attention though, and share those private things only with the people you know can keep a secret. If one of your loved ones has a tattling tongue, it’s best to just tell them things that aren’t so personal or intimate.
2. Don’t Be a Gossiper
I’m sure you are all familiar with that famous saying “do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Well, if you don’t want to be the subject of gossip among your colleagues, friends or even relatives, don’t be a gossiper yourself! Try to surround yourself by people who don’t appreciate this type of activity. This way, you’ll protect yourself and the ones you love from being the main concern of some people who have nothing else better to do.
3. Set an Example
If you’re trying to eliminate all gossip that may occur around you at work, at school or even when you go out with your friends, take a good look at yourself first and try to set a positive example. Pay attention to the things you say and to the way you behave. You shouldn’t care about what other people do, think or say. Focus on yourself and on the way you behave. Try to set an example among your peers. Set the right tone and it will be more likely they would follow you.
4. Try to Be Approachable
Another best way to avoid becoming the subject of gossip is by trying to be more approachable and more open to hearing different issues. If you always seem very busy and nobody can approach you when they’re having a problem, this may lead to gossip. Try to make time and really listen to what others are telling you, be empathetic and avoid any speculation. You will be appreciated for your transparency and you will seem more approachable.
5. Confront the Gossiper!
If you just found out that you are the subject of gossip among your friends or colleagues, try to find out where this started from and confront the gossiper. If a person who’s always gossiping thinks that their behavior has no negative consequences, they will continue to do so even though they hurt a lot of people because of their nasty habit. By confronting them, you will show them that what they are doing is wrong and you will increase the chances that the gossip about you will stop.
6. Refuse to Be Drawn in
A good way to avoid becoming the subject of gossip or even stop an existing story is by refusing to let yourself be drawn in. You should refuse to respond to different comments about an absent person and try to change the subject and also, you should try to be subtle about it. For example, the next time your friends are talking about your friend John, try bringing up something about John’s kids, and then switch the conversation to kids in general. Most likely, nobody will even notice that you changed the gossip to something else.
7. Adhere to the Rules of Society
In most cases, the people who become the subject of gossip have been involved in actions that can be considered somehow scandalous, inappropriate or even immoral by society nowadays. You shouldn’t give up on your dream or let anything stop you from doing what you want because you fear you might become the subject of gossip or that you might break some societal rules. You could try though to follow, as much as you can, some customs or standards that are promoted by society so you’ll avoid becoming the subject of gossip, but even so, don’t forget to stay true to yourself.
Unfortunately, you can always become the subject of gossip even if you didn’t do anything, and all that can happen because of some shameless gossipers, who have no problem in spreading false rumors about everyone. Did it ever happen to you to become the subject of gossip? What did you do? How do you think one can avoid becoming the subject of gossip? Do tell!