When a friendship is falling apart you usually feel it intuitively. It may feel like you can’t put your finger on it but you know it’s happening. Friendships can endure for many years but many of them do end and that’s just part of life. It can be very painful to go through, though. Here’re some ways you can handle a friendship that’s falling apart.
1. Tell Your Friend You Miss Them
Sometimes you can stop a friendship from falling apart. Other times it’s destined to happen. One thing you can do to try to halt a failing friendship is tell your friend you miss them. Let them know you love the times you spend together. You also want to allow for the fact that it’s possible your friend is super busy right now and when things slow down, your friendship will get back to normal.
2. Ask Them What’s up between the Two of You
It can be a good idea to ask your friend what’s going on between the two of you. Maybe there’s something bothering them about your friendship. Maybe they have hurt feelings over something. If they’re reluctant to talk about it then asking can encourage them to share what’s upsetting them. Sometimes there’s nothing wrong though; you’re simply drifting apart.
3. Give Them Some Space
A friend can have things going on in their life you don’t know about. If they don’t want to share then it can be helpful to give them some space to deal with things. This’s also sort of a test. You’re giving them room to deal with things in their life and allowing them to choose to continue your friendship or continue to put distance between you. It’s hard to accept when that happens but remind yourself that you’re strong and you’ll be fine.
4. Observe Them
Occasionally, it can be helpful to mentally step back from the friendship and observe what’s going on. When you do this, you may see your friend in a different light. You may see that you have less in common than you used to. You could see that your values are not as similar as you once thought or that you’re traveling in different circles now. It’s good to be observant; it can help you understand what’s happening better.
5. Think Things through
Sometimes you have to weigh a friendship out in your mind. After you think it over you may realize that the friendship wasn’t as good as you thought. You may begin to see your friend in a different light. You could even realize that you weren’t as good of a friend as you intended to be. Thinking things through may not change the fate of the friendship but it can help you feel more peaceful about it.
6. Let Go
This’s the hard part. Sometimes you don’t want a friendship to end. However, you can’t control a friend’s decision to distance themselves. Let them go with an open heart and focus on being thankful for their part in your life story. Be grateful for the time of friendship you shared.
7. Leave the Door Open to the Friendship
Unless your friend did something wrong that caused you to end your friendship, leave the door open to being friends in the future. It’s not unheard of for friends to drift apart for a period of time then rekindle their friendship. You’ll always have the connection of a past friendship. You’ll always have memories of times you shared. That can make it easier to be friends in the future.
These’re some ways to handle a friendship that’s falling apart. Have you been in this position? What helped you deal?