Want to know how to move on from grief? Life can be tough sometimes, leaving us with feelings of despair, loneliness, and sadness. We may lose those we love, suddenly, or even found ourselves in places of discomfort. According to Buddhist philosophy, the truth is that nothing is permanent and changes are frequent.
We may lose our lover, for an unknown reason, or a family member, or a pet, or our home. There’s no point of holding on to the past, and expect those we have lost to come back. People come in and come out of our life for a reason, Sometimes, better things await us, and we need to let go to allow new people to arrive in our life, and start something fresh, from the right beginning. It’s scary to think we can’t keep those we love or even our home. But the best thing is to learn how to cope and to move on. So how do we do that? Here's how to move on from grief.
1. Let Go and Never Hold on
Letting go is one of the best tips for how to move on from grief. There are countless articles online to help us understand how to let go. It’s easy to say, but hard to do. When we love someone, we have strong feelings of attachment, physical or emotional. And removing the connection may equal death for many of us. How about imagining that the role of these people in our life is over? That they came for a purpose, and now, we have been enriched by their presence, and we now need to look for something else? The most difficult part of this grieving process is not to let go, but to hold on.
2. Return to Our Own Beauty
When we lose someone, we start to have doubts about ourselves. We think we failed somewhere. We imagine we will never find someone better. It’s the end of the world. It’s like feeling death. But death is temporary. We’ll be revived soon. How? First, we need to enjoy our own beauty and find happiness where it seems only sadness lives. We need to look deep inside us and retrieve these moments of joy that make us happy in the present moment. The past is the past, we can’t go back to it. But what’s present is real. We should start by enjoying the now, and feel the vibrant us blossom again. It’s called beauty. Our inner self is pretty, so why don’t we celebrate it?
3. Practice Mindfulness
In loneliness, we can find peace and truth. When we are left alone, abandoned and fragile, we often resort to sadness. We should avoid this mistake because there’s nothing more powerful than being alone to reflect on ourselves, about what we want, and understand our mistakes. Loneliness gives us space to practice self-awareness so we can fix ourselves. Let’s find out what our values are, what we want the future to look like, who we want to be, and clarify the steps to get there. By adding meditation to our daily life in these moments of chaos, we can even speed up the process and deepen our knowledge about ourselves.
4. Meet Friends - Old and New
When nothing is left, home or boyfriend, job or projects, all we have to do is to call our family and spend time with friends. We should not cry at home forever. The world is beautiful, and even though our path came across the wrong people, we have tons of new faces to meet who will bring happy times. Patience is required. We must balance our time between meeting good friends, old and new. And while we are at it, why not take a small vacation with one of these old friends? Why not start up a new project with someone, and get our ass out of the shadows? It takes courage to fill our life with important, loved people again, but we should start small and take the chance to make new acquaintances.
5. Dating Apps?
Dating apps are what they are made for: hooking up people. When we are still grieving the loss of someone, we may imagine dating apps as time wasters and that we don’t need them in our life. But what we need, in these times of grieving, is distraction, and fun. Dating apps are not only used for having sex randomly but can be tried on to see that other person like us and give attention to us. Flirting is free, and when we realize many people are interested in us, it helps boost our ego. We feel appreciated again and we can start to gain the confidence that we are far from being lost. We don’t need to hook up with anyone. We can make friends and just have fun.
6. Offer Our Help to Someone
In dark times or self-searching moments that follow a separation or a loss, we can revert to being a good human being again. In fact, we should always aim at being a good human, but even more when we grieve. Offering our help in the form of donations or counseling others on their issues can help us remove our pain. When we suffer, there’s no need to focus on our suffering even more. Instead, we should acknowledge that there are people in way more difficult positions out there in the world who may need us. So instead of crying tears over that breakup or staying alone reminiscing about the past, why don’t we go outside and give a little help to those who need it?
7. Travel to Spiritual Countries
In Western cultures, when we feel low or sad due to some traumatic life event, we often seek the help of psychologists, or worse revert to medication, hoping it will help us go through the hard times. But healing can be achieved through spirituality and going back to our inner self. Practicing self-love and meditation, and encountering spiritual people from other cultures can have a drastic influence on how we cope with pain. Meeting with Buddhists or monks, or just meditating in temples, or even at home, is a winning healing strategy. So why don’t we rely on ourselves to feel better?