Do you struggle with telling people no? This is something many people struggle with. It may be that you hate to be put on the spot or that you just can’t bear not helping someone out. These are some signs that you’re often saying yes when you really want to say no. While it’s wonderful to want to do for others, it shouldn’t be at the cost of your own mental and physical reserves.
Table of contents:
- your schedule stays slammed
- you feel nervous at the thought of saying no
- you feel obligated to others
- you’ve been called a pushover
- you get a sinking feeling in your stomach
- you often feel overwhelmed
- you struggle with setting boundaries
1 Your Schedule Stays Slammed
One sign that you often say yes when you really want to say no to others is that your schedule is always packed. It could be other things are keeping you overbooked but it could also be your penchant for saying yes. Take a deeper look to determine the cause. If you see a lot of activities you’ve ended up agreeing to that you didn’t really want to do, this is a sign. A little hint you can use here when you’re put on the spot is to say that you have to check your schedule. This allows you time to consider if you truly want to say yes.
2 You Feel Nervous at the Thought of Saying No
Do you feel nervous at the thought of telling others no? It’s understandable that you might feel that way. You hate to disappoint anyone. You may feel afraid they’ll question you or argue with you if you do say no. A good way around this is to state that you can’t help them without offering an explanation.
3 You Feel Obligated to Others
This may be the most difficult one of all. You may feel obligated to others because they’ve done things for you. And you should make an effort to help those that’ve helped you, but not to your detriment. Help out when you can but know that it’s okay to say no if it’s going to cause you a hardship. Remember that you have your whole lifetime to help others out if it doesn’t work out the first time they ask.
4 You’ve Been Called a Pushover
Have you been called this before? Being a pushover isn’t the worst thing to be. But it isn’t the greatest either, as you probably know well. It’s good to stop and realize that you have every right to tell others no. It’s good to be helpful but not to the point that it’s hurtful to your own life.
5 You Get a Sinking Feeling in Your Stomach
If you get a sinking feeling in your stomach when others ask you to do something, then that’s a sign you probably really want to say no. That’s your truest self talking. It’s best to listen to your feelings and give them some credit. They usually know what’s best for you. You’ll never regret honoring yourself for how you feel.
6 You Often Feel Overwhelmed
I think that feeling overwhelmed is one of the worst feelings in the world. It’s something that you easily feel when you’re saying yes to things you want to say no to. While we all need to stretch a little and show care and compassion for others, it’s important not to take on too much. Helping others is something that you need to do in the way that works best for you. It’s an individual decision.
7 You Struggle with Setting Boundaries
Sometimes saying no to others is difficult to you because boundaries aren’t something that you’re good at. You may have never really given boundaries a lot of thought. That’s okay. We’re all always learning and changing. You can start working on that right now in your life.
These are some signs that you might say yes to people when you really want to say no. Do you see yourself in any of them? You’re always welcome to share.
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