If unattractive personality traits have started to define you, it’s probably time to leave them in the past and move on to being a better person. You won’t change who you are and how you act overnight; it’s a process. As you shed these unattractive personality traits over time, you’ll find yourself surrounded with good friends and a more well-rounded work environment, not to mention a better relationship with your significant other.
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1. Self-Destructive
Lindsay Lohan might be the poster girl for self-destruction, along with one of my favorite singers, the late, great Amy Winehouse. Self-destruction is the epitome of unattractive personality traits and the one that really requires professional help to overcome. If people in your life are asking you to seek help, I hope you’ll consider it.
Self-destructive behavior often manifests in neglecting personal health, engaging in risky activities, or continually making choices that lead to personal and professional setbacks. It's the type of trait that can quickly spiral out of control, affecting not only the individual but also their loved ones. Recognizing this pattern is the first step to healing. Remember, there's no shame in admitting you need support; reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness. Embracing change can lead to a happier, healthier life, one where you are in control, not your inner saboteur.
2. Gossip
If you’re talking about friends behind their backs, what kind of friend are you? If you’re repeating things you’ve heard that might or might not be true, you could be forever damaging someone’s reputation. In some workplaces, gossiping is grounds for separation from the company. Think twice before saying anything about others, and you’ll find more people will trust you with confidences.
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3. Unreliable
One of my pet peeves is people showing up late for something we have planned together. This can happen to anyone because of circumstances beyond their control, but when it’s done repeatedly, it’s just a blatant form of disrespect. If you’re going to be late, pick up the phone and call the person waiting for you, and have a good reason to go along with your apology.
4. Pessimistic
One of the nicest things you can do for someone is to be optimistic and show enthusiasm for their plans. Friends or family members that are considering starting a new business, a new relationship, a diet, or any of a hundred things, would love to hear encouragement instead of all the reasons their plans won’t work.
5. Moody
I love consistency. I love it in restaurants, especially if I’m bringing people along after raving about the cuisine. I love consistency in people even more, and that’s saying something because I love food. I want to know that the person I’m going to hang out with tonight will be the same agreeable person I spent time with last week.
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6. Bossy
If you’re in a leadership position, it could be very tempting to be bossy. Don’t give in to it. Delegating projects to your team should be done in a way that will make them eager to do a great job. Barking orders has the opposite effect. In a friendship or romance, being bossy can be the kiss of death.
7. Toxic
I had a longtime friend who was a toxic person. One day, in his typical toxic way, he accused me of having no sense of humor. When you care about someone, the things they say to you not only hurt, but you tend to believe them. It was only after disassociating myself from this person that I was able to regain my optimism and sense of fun. The good people in my life that I then mixed with kept telling me how funny I was. I always enjoyed making people laugh and it took me so many years to realize that being with a toxic person can rub off on you.
8. Controlling
If you’re a controlling person, chances are you won’t recognize the signs in yourself. Hopefully, people in your life will tell you and try to help you. You can just ask yourself simple questions and give honest answers to find out if this is behavior you’re guilty of displaying. When you have the need to regulate someone else’s life, to constantly inform them that your way is the only way, you’re controlling. You should know that sooner or later, the person you are controlling would rid themselves of you and your desire to dominate them.
Are you friends with someone that displays negative personality traits? Have you attempted to discuss it with them? It’s easy to pretend it doesn’t exist for the sake of harmony, but you know that harmony is short-lived when you’re dealing with a person that has personality issues. Share your stories so we can all grow.
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