9 Things I Learned about Myself during a Quarter Life Crisis ...

By Heather

9 Things I Learned about Myself during a Quarter Life Crisis ...

Unless you’ve read my blog, I’m sure you wouldn’t think that I have ever been through a quarter life crisis. Well, believe it or not, like many women in their twenties, I have. I have had one of the hardest last eighteen years of most people you might know, but my story isn’t a pity story, but instead, one of strength. I also know I’m not the only person to have been through hardships, nor are mine as bad as many others’ I’ve met. Still, I’m extremely humbled to not only have survived the last ten years of my life, but be here to tell about it, and be incredibly happy with life right now. I couldn’t have gotten through sexual abuse, a family divorce, a deathly eating disorder, the death of my father, losing every best friend I ever had, financial ruin and living off government aid, being unemployed after graduating college two years, and surviving a near death traffic accident, without grace, perseverance, and strength I was sure I didn’t have. Let me tell you something- you are all stronger than you know, and if you’re like me and in your teens, twenties or even any older, I’m telling you that life does move on, if you want it to. If you’ve been through a quarter life crisis and don’t know where to start, try reading what I learned about myself, and see what you can learn about yourself during this hard time you’re going through. Trust me, you’re more amazing than you know, even when you don’t feel like it!

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1

That I Wasn’t Made of Steel

That I Wasn’t Made of Steel Before my world crashed, I was like everyone else and really never even knew what a quarter life crisis was. Yet, in the midst of one, I learned I wasn’t emotionally void of pain, and sometimes, there were days I felt like I had nothing left. Yet, even though I realized I wasn’t made of steel, I learned how to live through pain. I learned that getting up each day, going out for a walk, sitting down to write, and doing simple things like making up my bed and cooking were signs that I could make it through. Soon, day by day, I learned to survive, even in the midst of sadness, being broke, being ill and living in distraught grief.

2

That People Couldn’t Fix My Problems

That People Couldn’t Fix My Problems How many of you have always relied on your friends or parents to cheer you up or fix things? Well, during my trials, I learned that friends and even family, can’t always fix things for you. They can support you and love you, but when it comes down to it, it’s up to you to survive, be strong and make the changes you need to have a life for yourself in the future.

3

That I Had Some Issues to Work through

That I Had Some Issues to Work through Listen, just to be honest, I was a train wreck in my mid twenties. I was deathly underweight, in a brain fog for about two years after my dad’s death, I personally looked like death, suffered anorexia and binge eating at the same time, lost my ability to drive, and I was financially so far in debt I couldn’t see above water. I was a wreck, and I had to face my issues and deal with them face to face. As ugly as that was, it was the only way to move ahead.

4

That I Had to Stop and Listen More

That I Had to Stop and Listen More Instead of trying to control my body, and decide what I wanted it to be, I had to learn to listen to it more. Not only physically, but emotionally. Since I was 10, I shoved away emotional feelings trying to be strong, and instead, ended up becoming depressed, taking my issues on out on food, spending money and relying on friends or relationships to fill the void. I had no self esteem or sense of independence. During my quarter life crisis, I learned that I needed to stop trying to do and control, and listen more. If my body needed to eat, I let it eat good food. If it needed to rest, I let it rest. If it wanted to move or was anxious, I went for a walk or jog. I also had to learn to listen more to my intuition than rely on other people’s opinions to guide me.

5

That Movement Can Be My Medicine

That Movement Can Be My Medicine I’ve never appreciated movement so much as when I did when I went through a hard time. I refused antidepressants, and instead learned just how therapeutic yoga, walking,stretching and healthy food can be. I gave up my gym rat days and instead, turned to nature for a workout and wellness. I walked and ran outside, then came in and did yoga in candlelight with the windows open, allowing the sensations and movements of my body to calm me, strengthen me and center me. If it sounds hokey, it might be, but it worked in incredible ways. Many times, movement can help you sort through things in your head. Exercise is just as mental, as it is physical.

Famous Quotes

If you would take, you must first give, this is the beginning of intelligence.

Laozi
6

That I Had More than I Thought

That I Had More than I Thought No, I didn’t have the luxury of shopping at Whole Foods each week anymore, I didn’t buy any new clothes for two years straight, I had to live off $40 a week for groceries many weeks, and I didn’t ever get the luxury of going out to eat, having an iPad, or going to a movie. Yet, I did learn just how much I did have. I had a family who loved me and a mother who let me live with her, I was able to get aid financially to provide food for myself, I was able to have a safe neighborhood to walk in each day, and I had a roof over my head, along with just enough money to buy myself healthy food, plus, I had hands that allowed me to write and create, giving me an outlet for release. Plus, my health was recovering, which was more than I could have asked for above anything.

7

I Was Smart Enough to Survive

I Was Smart Enough to Survive I always knew I was a smart girl, but I didn’t realize just how smart I was until I had only my skills to rely on during my hard times. I was smart enough to cook for myself each day, create my blog, get a freelance writing job, and turn my life around through various resources where I could afford a better lifestyle for myself, free of financial aid. I realized I was smart, and I didn’t need money, the perfect life, or rainbows and puppy dogs to show me that. I just needed to finally start believing it.

8

That My Story Could Help Others

That My Story Could Help Others One of the best things I learned during my quarter life crisis was that my story could help more people than I knew. That was the thing that truly kept me going. I knew my story wasn’t just a story of grief and sadness, but I was building a testimony. It was my responsibility to not only survive, but be able to share it, so others could too.

9

That I Was Capable of a Better Life

That I Was Capable of a Better Life Lastly, one thing that always kept me going was I didn’t accept where I was. I knew I didn’t want to live that life forever. There comes a time in a person’s life when tragedy hits, a fork occurs in the road, and you must choose which road you want to go down. You can stay where you’re at, and proceed down a road that leads to a life of sadness, hardship and loneliness, or you can take the road that is unknown, harder, yet incredibly worth it, and live a better life. I knew I wanted to go down that second road and knew I could. It would take time, but I had to keep moving forward, and I did.

If you’re dealing with a hard time, don’t give up or in. Forgive, accept, and move ahead each day you have. If you’ve ever been through a hard time, what helped get you through?
Sources: soulfulspoon.com

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Great article I love how inspirational it is. I\'ve been going thru the quarter LIfe crisis for a few yrs Past suppressed feelings all the sudden rushed back so I\'ve been reading a lot of books but it\'s a process that need to be done within so I\'m happy that others have survived it as I\'m still finding my way thru :)

Thank you for sharing.. You are Avery strong young lady... And life hits us many times over... Often we need to look into ourselves for motivation.. And inspiration.. But hearing stories like yours adds to that!

Thank you so much. My story is no different from yours, hardships have become my part of life now. Your blog really motivated me especially the last point. Once again thank you so much.

Where can we get the address of your blog? I\'m lost in my 38 years old. I feel empty and I don\'t know what I want in life. It\'s so depressing to feel lost.

I couldnt have written this any better!!!!! Its simply amazing and sooo true thank you a ton for writing this and youre def an inspiration in hard times!

amazing !!

This is so true and I wish more people would talk about this! I recently went through the same thing.... In a job I hated, struggling with a resurgence in bulimia, and severely depressed and anxious, was even diagnosed with agoraphobia! I prayed constantly, journaled daily, and really really meditated on what I wanted.... Not what my parents, boyfriend, or society wanted for or from me. I was fortunate to have supportive parents and an amazing boyfriend (who is now my husband) give me loving and patient understanding that I needed. Ladies no matter how dark it may seem, no matter how many days you want to stay curled up in bed all day.... There is someone out there who loves you and things will get better! You are strong and beautiful and can get through anything!

I really loved this so much! I just turned 20 last month and I\'m slowly learning these things for myself.

So amazing to read something like this! Honestly I am going through something similar and have figured out I need a change. After the death of my dad who was my best friend and everything to me, I feel lost. Reading this has started to open my eyes and show me things I can start doing. Thank you so much!!!

Always refreshing to hear good words when you are going through. Thanks for the reminders!

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